There is only one #25 - it's not Gerald Green

by grungedave on Feb 25, 2008 9:55 AM CST Comment 4 comments

What the hell is this? I'm all for the Gerald Green trade. He's a native Houstonian. He's young and athletic. He can blow out candles and dunk at the same time. All good things.

Except this.

There is only one player who deserves to wear #25 with "Houston" or "Rockets" on the front of the jersey. His name is not Gerald Green. It's this guy:

This is almost as insulting as the Oakland Raiders letting LaMont Jordan wear Bo's #34. Yes, it's true - someone else is wearing #34 for the Silver and Black. It's blasphemy. Just like the Rockets letting someone else wear Robert Horry's number.

I realize that Horry isn't retired yet, and that's why his number hasn't been retired officially by the team. Nevertheless, if we can retire Carroll Dawson's "jersey" (with the number "CD"?) - how we haven't retired all of the numbers from the Championship Team is beyond me. Horry played 4 years for Houston. He's going to contribute more than Gerald Green ever will. Of this I have no doubt.

It's insulting enough that Chauncey Billups is trying to infringe upon Horry's should-be-trademarked nickname of "Big Shot ___". Chauncey has made ONE "Big Shot" in his entire career. And that somehow gives him claim to Horry's nickname? Gerald Green has even less of a claim to Horry's number.

Hey, Rockets equipment manager -- fix this egregious mistake before it's too late!!!

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I've tried to get this across to you before, but it apparently didn't set; Robert Horry is as gay as Neil Patrick Harris' loofa. Will this impact your feeling toward Loves Big Cock Bob? I don't know. But it should. When I was eleven years old the Want's acquired their first family pet; a dog by the name of "Rocky." I loved Rocky. He was a tad obnoxious, liked to chew things, and smelled like a mexican's nuts covered in mothballs, but he was a great dog. When I was twelve, I stepped out of the back door to check up on Rocky. Up to that point i'd never come across him in a sexual interaction with another dog. This was about to change. Much to my surprise Rocky was putting it to another, smaller dog. I was unable, or unwilling to turn away. I had to get a better look. I didn't at first recognize penetratee before, but I quickly noticed something had gone horrificly wrong. The dog on the bottom had a fully aroused, slimey, red dogcockm and it became clear that the penetratee was the neighbor's dog, Hercules The Destroyer. I was scarred. I couldn't look at Rocky the same, and I certainly didn't feel the same about him. Several months later he would escape from his enclosed habitat never to be heard from again. I didn't shed a tear, and I even secretly wished my mom had him put down.

by Jeremy Want on Feb 25, 2008 5:06 PM CST reply actions 0 recs