Game 37 Preview: Utah Jazz at Houston Rockets
by ak2themax on Jan 8, 2011 9:01 AM CST
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I hate the Utah Jazz. I hate them I hate them I hate them. Since the beginning of man, the Jazz have been tools. The Utah Jazz make Charlie Sheen seem like a gentlemen. I hate the Jazz more than I hate all those crappy vampire movies, television shows, and books. I hate the Jazz more than I hate Jersey Shore. I hate the Jazz more than I hate Lil' Wayne. All of those seem like mild annoyances compared to the team from Salt Lake City. Let me show you why.
They cheat:
Utah Jazz flops (via IamKobe5566)
They teach their new players to flop, too:
Raja Bell Flop (via Immortal24Dragon)
They signed the biggest jerk in basketball, whom they knew had just lied to his team:
via dimemag.com
I hate the Jazz like I hate the Nazis, baby-snatchers, and rapists. I hate Jazz fans like I hate cancer. Even Voldemort knows that being a Jazz fan is a line you shouldn't cross. But please, don't blame them for being misguided.
Luckily, the game is in Houston, where the Rockets will be well-rested dead tired after their game in nearby New Orleans Orlando. God, I hate the NBA schedule makers. And you know Jazz fans will think that if they win it proves that they are superior to us.
Matchups...
Point Guard
Kyle Lowry vs. Deron Williams:
Isn't this why we brought Courtney Lee to Houston? To see if he could guard guys like D-Will?
I hate the Jazz, but I'm okay with Williams. In fact, I broke my only fantasy basketball rule (never draft a Jazz or Mav) this year and paid $55 for him in my auction draft.
OK, Lowry. That was your worst offensive game of the season. 0 points? That's disgraceful. Get it back tonight.
Edge: Jazz
Shooting Guard
Kevin Martin vs. Raja Bell
K-Mart took the Denver game personally, and has played like it in these last two games. I like what I see, and I want more. It's like K-Mart's good play is my drug. If only he could play defense. Did you see that he had the worst +/- on the team against the Magic?
Raja Bell is a punk. See the above video. And he plays for the Jazz, so his family is damned to douchedom.
Edge: Rockets
Small Forward
Shane Battier vs. Andrei Kirilenko
If Shane Battier is Captain Awesome, Andrei is Captain Turd Nugget. My brothers actually remember back in the day when I asked, "When is that guy going to die?" I'm still waiting.
And I hate that we have the same initials. I have a group of people I play basketball with that try to call me AK-47 and I just want to break something. I must break him.
Edge: Even
Power Forward
The only reason to like Paul Millsap is that he's not Carlos Boozer.
Great first quarter for Scola, then he disappears. What happened to Scola? This is not the same guy who was playing for us at the beginning of the season. The effort is still there, don't get me wrong. But that's not the Argentine we signed.
Edge: Even, hopefully
Center
Jordan Hill vs. Al Jefferson
The Rocket killer himself, and now he plays for the team I despise the most. Awesome combination. Just awesome. Maybe Hill can defend him better than Yao or Chuck could?
Yeah, no chance, I know.
Edge: Jazz
Bench
Jazz: C.J. Miles, Gordon Hayward, Earl Watson, Jeremy Evans, Ronnie Price, Kyrylo Fesenk, Francisco Elson
Rockets: Brooks, Courtney Lee, Chase Budinger, Patrick Patterson, Brad Miller, Terrence Williams
Edge: Rockets. Not even close, except our bench hasn't been great recently.
Injuries
Jazz: Mehmet Okur
Rockets: Yao Ming out, Aaron Brooks day-to-day
Prognosis: Hopeful, but ultimately bad
Final note: can you tell I hate the Jazz? Probably not this much, but a lot.
111 comments
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The Jazz will think they are better than us
because the Jazz are better than us. Ugh, the Rockets SUCK right now. No identity, no hustle.
What was the point of that?
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 12:14 PM CST up reply actions
better better?
Welcome to the world of utah literacy, or lack thereof. Now if it had been sister, or 12yr old I’m pretty damn sure it’d b more fluid. You know what they say, u alwys can spell the bames of things u put ur dick in. That’s y I can spell jerry sloan so well
by ShookednShanghaied11 on Jan 8, 2011 5:38 PM CST via mobile up reply actions
The Jazz just lost to the Grizzlies by 11. They’re not exactly amazing
by VBG on Jan 8, 2011 2:21 PM CST up reply actions
>Implying the Magic and Grizzlies are equals
Oh u.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
Then don't equate them
>equivocation
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
wow
wow you so called rockets fans are classless. About as classless as any NBA fan base Ive seen, and Ive seen some pretty bad ones. calling the Jazz F8ckers? Seriously? You guys are just jealous you dont have the smarts that we do, and always out play you (especially in the playoff. Ex: 2007, 2008) And we dont have to think were better than you cause we are better. So get some class first then we’ll talk
Oh and also quit B*tchin bout how the jazz always play to physical get over it its a game
He stated the fact that he hates the Jazz
then provided several reasons why including, but not limited to, the fact that they cheat. Then, for extra credit, he provided video evidence of said cheating. You can keep the cheating Euro trash that is the Utah Jazzholes and we’ll see you on the court biatch!
by theSpaceCityKid on Jan 8, 2011 11:03 AM CST up reply actions
fine as for the jazz
but why does everybody think that euro ball is trash?
And if anything, it is not cheating.
theres no reference to the Euro- style game
being trash nor that IT is cheating…. only that the European players on the Jazz are trash and cheat. That is all.
by theSpaceCityKid on Jan 10, 2011 8:34 AM CST up reply actions
You out play us?
See: 1990s
If you're a fan of basketball, watch a movie called Sonicsgate. It's free, just google it.
I'm sorry we can't understand you our championship rings are clogging up our ears.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 12:13 PM CST up reply actions 1 recs
And your comment isn't classless?
If Jerry Sloan had the smarts, wouldn’t he have a ring by now? Just sayin
by twinkilling0303 on Jan 8, 2011 12:27 PM CST up reply actions
mine is not
my comment is not classless Im just pointing out that we own you in the playoffs. Like i saif before Im not the one calling the jazz F*ckers, mother F*ckers, or Euro trash
just sayin
How many rings do you have?
Zero.
Just sayin’.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 3:38 PM CST up reply actions
Really? Out Play Us
I usually respect the opponent, but seriously out play us? Do you remember that time we took you out in the playoffs 2 years in a row and then won the titles. How many titles did you win with Malone & Stockton again?
by Sricharan Iyengar on Jan 8, 2011 3:33 PM CST up reply actions
a utah fan talking about class?
For real?
For rizzles?
Forget it
We’re talking about the nastiest, most racist group of cousin screwing rednecks ever allowed to go to a proffesional sports game and that a considerable feat given dallas teams
This is the arena which booed fisher and mocked his daughter for being ill and then holds signs up which cannot be showed on national television due to their vulgar and coarse nature.
I seem to remeber marv albert expressing his befuddlement at the thought that people could leave their homes with such things as were written upon those signs.
I can’t wait till williams leaves and comes back to texas, and ofcourse I can’t wait till sloan gets ass raped to death.
by ShookednShanghaied11 on Jan 8, 2011 5:45 PM CST via mobile up reply actions 1 recs
Hopefully Scola will play some sort of defense tonight
even though this season has been a disappointment, it’s still the NBA and it’s still Rockets basketball. Getting a win tonight over the Utah freaking Jazz would go a long ways towards healing the pain of the last few games.
by twinkilling0303 on Jan 8, 2011 11:59 AM CST reply actions
On a side note
Woj at Yahoo just said that the T-Wolves called about Brooks and “dangled” Flynn. Talks went nowhere.
by twinkilling0303 on Jan 8, 2011 12:06 PM CST reply actions
Who is flynn? They need to give up Kevin Love. There’s no one else on that roster worth mentioning.
"it just goes to show ya: People look like famous people sometimes! "
- chuckhayesALLSTAR2010
by ClutchFanSince94 on Jan 8, 2011 1:56 PM CST up reply actions
I say Morey sends Kahn a photo of himself
dangling something for that trade offer. Kevin Love or GTFO David.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
If Morey could get a Pekovic and maybe a draft pick,
I’d do it. Look at what Utah traded for Al Jefferson. Morey could probably get a first rounder, Flynn, and Pekovic for just AB.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 3:39 PM CST up reply actions
johnny flyn for brooks?
Awesome. Then we can trade martin for a sofa cushion and b set.
Cross ur fingers that we could get darko for scola, miller, a healthy yao and 17 million
by ShookednShanghaied11 on Jan 8, 2011 5:53 PM CST via mobile up reply actions
We could get much much more than AB from them.
I didn’t say I’d trade Flynn for AB. I’d trade AB for a first rounder, Pekovic, and Flynn.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 5:58 PM CST up reply actions
How can you not show the flop that AK had on Dirk?
That one was hilarious.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
don't say it about other fans
just say it about me. And how is yelling at refs for 48 minutes and getting them to give you every call classy?
How many Biletnikoffs does he have? NOT TWO!
by ak2themax on Jan 8, 2011 12:34 PM CST up reply actions 1 recs
you started this
why must you call the jazz F*ckers?
plus the jazz dont get every call, infact its the exact opposite, they dont get a calls that other players do
You're a troll
What’s classless is high-jacking a thread from a bitter rival’s blog and complaining about what they say. People use names to mock things they hate – get over it.
by smassape on Jan 8, 2011 1:17 PM CST up reply actions 3 recs
Yo
I see what you’re doing, and I’mma let you finish, but Karl Malone’s ringless career has got to be the greatest butthurt of all time.
Also, if you’re the mouthpiece for all jazz fans I can see now why they all play vuvuzelas out their backsides.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
by BD34 on Jan 8, 2011 1:18 PM CST up reply actions 2 recs
But remember?
Karl Malone is coming back according to his Shape-Up Commercials. He’s gonna cement that legacy. Or maybe he should take some of that time to go meet his freakin son. A-hole
The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. ~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes
by TheChuckwagonisrolling on Jan 8, 2011 1:24 PM CST up reply actions
Having a son
and disowning him for little to no reason is one of the classiest things you can do man. I’ve got like 14 just because Karl Malone is my idol. I wear monocles all the time, drink tea, and s*it the queen, so clearly I’m full on class.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
Not any tea, my friend.
It must be Earl Gray. That exudes clasiness. Also, when cooking easy mac, it must be eaten on the finest plates, drinking Kool-Aid in the finest crystal goblets. Then you have achieve clasiness not seen since I left Texas.
The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. ~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes
by TheChuckwagonisrolling on Jan 8, 2011 5:31 PM CST up reply actions
I never pulled out the F word
anybody here will tell you that I don’t swear, and I don’t say anything of the sort. And every team believes they don’t have the favor of the refs. What I can’t stand are teams that don’t play real defense. Want to draw a charge? I’m all for it. But when guys fly back like they’ve been shot out of a cannon when they are grazed, I get upset.
How many Biletnikoffs does he have? NOT TWO!
ok
fine its not your video but i just dont like that video trashing the jazz.. the jazz are not mother f*ckers and kirilenko is not Euro trash like other people have said on here.
He's not Euro Trash
He’s just straight up trash.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
by BD34 on Jan 8, 2011 2:02 PM CST up reply actions 3 recs
why
i could say the same for a couple of players on your team but i wont….
but why do you think that?
The flopping
the crying, and the continual scowl he keeps on his face. That and the fact that he is far overpaid and in general is just a chippy guy on the court. Then again if this is going to evolve into a civil conversation I’m not sure how far it goes with you. Also, congratulations on having far more TDS Posts than SLC Dunk posts.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
I bet he got banned from here, so he made a new account so he could comment on here again.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 3:41 PM CST up reply actions
congratulations on having far more TDS Posts than SLC Dunk posts.
That basically says all you need to know about this guy. What a troll.
"Sometimes the things that make you great, also make you an asshole."
by ressaliance_00 on Jan 8, 2011 7:25 PM CST up reply actions
Rec'd.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 3:40 PM CST up reply actions
/yawns/
If you have something remotely constrictive to say (haha, I know) please do. Otherwise, GTFO!
"You know what they say - Fool me once: strike one. But fool me twice... strike three."
by RocketsAstros on Jan 8, 2011 12:35 PM CST up reply actions
We are classy
I’m so classy I wear a monocle while engaging in coitus with your maternal parent.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
The irony in this statement is unbelievable.
Who’s the one who came over here to troll? You. Go back to SLC and talk shit about us. At least we don’t go over there and do what you are doing. As far as I’m concerned, we are more classy than you.
We hate your team with a passion, boohoo. The Celtics hate the Lakers and the Lakers hate the Celtics. There are rivalries in sports. What are you going to do next? Get OU and UT fans to love each other?
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 12:44 PM CST up reply actions
seroiusly?
you more classy than me? hahahahahaha yeah right
Im not the one saying i hate the rockets while your blogger over here says the jazz are F*ckers
now you dont see me saying that, do ya? and plus im not calling out any rockets while you call Kirilenko Euro trash. Now who’s the classy one again? hmmmmm
You came over here specifically to troll.
Think again.
If you are unable to understand what my point is, then I won’t blame you, you’re a Jazz fan.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 3:37 PM CST up reply actions 2 recs
In my limitless classiness
I must say the music in the flop video just doesn’t work for me. The French need to find some other effective medium to make music, like Daft Punk.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
Yeah
I wasn’t a fan either, but the video itself gets my point across. And yeah, Daft Punk is awesome.
How many Biletnikoffs does he have? NOT TWO!
It's cause we're classy individuals
that we share this thought.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
Classiness wins games
I heard Michael Jordan was always a great guy and never said anything bad while on court
If you're a fan of basketball, watch a movie called Sonicsgate. It's free, just google it.
Wait.....My sarcasm meter just exploded...
Did I detect a hint of sarcasm?
The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. ~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes
by TheChuckwagonisrolling on Jan 8, 2011 1:12 PM CST up reply actions
A humble suggestion
of an extra video for the write up:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rdPRnRI0r84
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
I would
but then we’re really taking a shot at them. It’s more of a direct attack.
How many Biletnikoffs does he have? NOT TWO!
Fair enough.
It’s more anecdotal than it is tangible proof. Though the Home Court Advantage thing is pretty solid in that video.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
same for you
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjUS9LckEJs
and you say the jazz flop? look at battier’s career. he’s made a career of flopping
Love that
the video centers on guys that aren’t even with the team anymore and the best insults they have are “Hurr, Scola r ugly n Chuck Hayes can has ugly free throw!”
Alston – Not with the team
Wells – Long gone
McGrady – Nope
Yao – On contract, in absentia for two years
No one ever said Battier never flopped, only that the Jazz put on a clinic in it.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
and Chuck had been making his free throws
before he got injured
How many Biletnikoffs does he have? NOT TWO!
There's a difference between how Battier flops and AK flops.
Battier doesn’t really flop that much, he just takes charges in the lane. He doesn’t flop as much as he used to anyway. Now, what AK does is jerk backward and then proceeds to have a seizure on the floor to ensure he gets the call.
Make sense now?
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 3:44 PM CST up reply actions
ok
but notice how all those players were washed up that’s why they arent with the team anymore while the jazz basically have their core players
and look at my other post idiot. i said you think the jazz are floppers?, just look at battier, he flops all the time especially with him playing the Lakers.
u mad?
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
What's important to remember
is that the majority of my posts were just trolling a troll, it’s not responding to his substance, the red cape and bull idea my friends.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
And as you have so eloquently shown today
one must always consider the source of the information they receive, and ignore the ignorant in that process.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
We may be classless
But atleast we ain’t ringless
If you're a fan of basketball, watch a movie called Sonicsgate. It's free, just google it.
by .Bonzo on Jan 8, 2011 3:18 PM CST up reply actions 2 recs
Why are you still here?
You will never convince us that the Jazz are not floppers. We will always hate them with a passion.
We haven’t had a legit reason to hate their fans until you came along. Way to represent them respectfully.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 3:46 PM CST up reply actions
Hate to say it..
Hell, I love to say it, but you’re kinda ridiculous saying that. You come onto a Rockets blog and you trash the Rockets and you are surprised in our response? We hate the Jazz, but we do it in our own forum where we can share in the hate.
by Patrick Harrel on Jan 8, 2011 7:18 PM CST up reply actions
Stop replying to anything he says, he's probably 12
Anyways, my Pat Pat prediction is 28 min., 10 pts, 8 rebs., 2 blocks.
I was very disappointed with T-Will’s showing last night, he didn’t pass the ball once as he did in the previous game.
by patrickln on Jan 8, 2011 3:52 PM CST reply actions 1 recs
Would you?
He had a chance for about 7 assists and his team mates missed layups and the pass in general. There comes a point where you give them a shot but if they’re not going to come through for you, don’t reward that.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
Yeah, I agree
he made some great passes in his first couple of games, but no one is finishing. He’ll have to start trusting them again. They’ll have to earn it in practice and games.
How many Biletnikoffs does he have? NOT TWO!
Played with a kid like that in high school
you learn to be extra aware on the court. You never knew when the ball was coming but you knew it was going to come. He was a good shooter too so he had his options to create. You just have to take one errant ball to the chest before you wake up and keep an eye open.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
If ever I am in Houston
you will be notified, sir. Need a good point scoring point? =P
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
Worth it then
when the shot isn’t falling it goes to cutting.
I don't usually plan out my days because the word "premeditation" gets thrown around a lot in courts today.
Ever need a 3-point specialist that can't shoot?
by Patrick Harrel on Jan 8, 2011 7:03 PM CST up reply actions
Got that covered here
but you can never have enough Reggie Miller wannabes, am I right?
How many Biletnikoffs does he have? NOT TWO!
Never... Just ask Trevor Ariza
I’m actually not horrible, but I make fun of myself. I’m a 6’3" guy so I can sorta be a big man in pickup games, but I’m more of a David Andersen big guy… Minus the disgusting hair-do he’s rocking these days.
by Patrick Harrel on Jan 8, 2011 7:12 PM CST up reply actions
+1
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 4:12 PM CST up reply actions
BEST GAME PREVIEW EVER!!!
SINCERELY 2 THUMBS UP
Jazz fan here, bowing as a respect to your team
Where is grungedave? I thought he was the one who is the authority of all things Jazz hate? I like his comments when I visit TDS. I read his Jazz-related archives a lot.
How I wish we could see you again this coming playoffs.
Dave is off and on.
He’s busy most of the time with work(just a guess).
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on Jan 8, 2011 6:00 PM CST up reply actions
Now
here’s a Jazz fan who can actually comprehend the beauty of a true, hate-filled rivalry and not go home crying about it. Props to you.
"Sometimes the things that make you great, also make you an asshole."
by ressaliance_00 on Jan 8, 2011 7:30 PM CST up reply actions
Utah is the best actors in the NBA, I think they...
won the NBA Academy Award for BEST FLOP!!! And Kirilenko won for NBA BEST ACTOR in a FLOP!!!!
But my favorite is RA......his slapping down of his arms at calls, cracks me up!!!!
Really??? Can I see a more aggressive RA towards Refs, stand up for your team!!!!
My dislike of the Mavericks is very close to that of the Jazz
Although, no team can top the Jazz, go Rockets, if they win this one, its going to be a party over here!
The Jazz games
are easily my favorite of the year. If only to see all the Jazz fans come onto the site and bitch about us not liking them. 2 will and forever be > than 0. Go Rockets!
"Sometimes the things that make you great, also make you an asshole."
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