Bring back the Kiss of Death: Why I want Mario Elie to be the Rockets' next head coach
Coach Sleepy is gone. He's not walking through that door. Not sober, at least. Meanwhile, Daryl Morey and the Rockets continue to search for their next head coach. Matter of fact, I think our boy genius GM is in Hollywood interviewing Whoopie Goldberg for the position today - hey, she was in that Eddie movie, right? If you can get the Knicks to win anything that has to be recognized. Personally, I think we've already found our candidate. Along those lines, here are a few factors I am personally looking for in the next coach:
A. No retreads. That means guys like Mike Woodson, Kevin McHale, Dwayne Casey (why do I want to spell it "Dwyane"!?!?), Lawrence Frank and John Lucas need not apply in my world.
B. No former ballboys or equipment managers or video guys. Yes, I know Erik Spoelstra is a fine coach and he's managed to not slap LeBron across the face for being the bitch he is, but... those kinds of coaches tend to get no respect from NBA professionals. It will catch up to Mr. Spoelstra soon enough.
C. No one too young or too old. Rick Adelman was fine and all, but he was at the twilight of his career when we hired him. If he was ever going to win a ring it would have been with Portland or Sacramento. On the flip side, unlike the NFL where guys like Mike Tomlin can come in and win while still being younger than some of the players he is coaching, the NBA typically does not work that way. I want to find a coach in his early to late-40s who is primed to take over and win NOW.
D. We're looking for the next Phil Jackson. Not the next Del Harris.
Also, we should remember that Phil has not learned from his parents. He never accepted the concept of sharing. Do you realize that 11 of the last 20 championship rings belong to Phil Jackson? The only active coaches with rings are Phil, Gregg Popovich and Doc Rivers. Larry Brown and Pat Riley are technically retired and Rudy T is off scouting for the Lakers and drinking heavily with Pau Gasol. That's it. That's the list.
Accordingly, I want a coach that will bring the Rockets into the next generation of the NBA - someone with heart and fire and a connection to the Rockets' glory of old. Someone like...

That's right. The Kiss of M--ther F--kin' Death.
Normally I'd say "hire Robert Horry!!" (of course), but even I recognize that Mr. Horry had little use for the regular season. It's not exactly a trait that would be conducive to being a successful NBA head coach.
That leaves Mario Elie.
And this is not even a joke. Elie is more than qualified to be a head coach right now. He has been an assistant coach with Golden State and Sacramento. We all know how much of a badass Monta Ellis is as a player, right? Well....... Mario Elie was the guy who took the raw 19 year old kid and turned him into an offensive dynamo. Elie taught him the ropes, how to play the NBA game and how to be a professional. While Golden State and Sacramento haven't exactly won a ton of basketball games, that's not something you can blame on Elie. (Both of those franchises have been wrecked by bad management and no one really argues this point.)
Elie has legitimate credibiilty.
He was never a glory boy NBA player. He was not even drafted out of college. He earned his way into the NBA on grit and determination. He's exactly the kind of grinder that a roster of NBA players will not only respect but be able to relate to. He can look someone like Yao Ming in the face (okay, maybe not literally) and carry the same legitimacy as he would with a roster clinger like Marcus Cousin.
Let us also not forget that Elie and Les Alexander go wayyyy back. When Les first purchased the Rockets in 1993, he promised a "major acquisition" shortly thereafter. The masses eagerly awaited a trade for an NBA Superstar™ to pair with Hakeem and Otis and Horry and Kenny. Instead... Les threw everyone a curve-ball and traded for Mario Elie. While everyone was confused at the time, it turned out that Les may have known what he was doing. Because........this happened:

Then this happened:

Mario Elie (along with Sam Cassell) brought Houston its first major sports championship in their very first season with the franchise. In short, Mario is a winner. (Suck on that, Charlie Sheen.) Even when he left the Rockets....... Elie just went to San Antonio and collected yet another ring. He's a pro's pro and a champion. This is exactly the kind of presence we need on the sideline. And since we are kinda sorta on the subject, I know Sam Cassell interviwed for the Head Coach position as well, but I don't think he's quite ready. But why not put him on Mario's staff? No reason not to.
I vote for a Mario/Sam ticket in 2011-2012. Who's with me?
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Good points
I would like to know more about what kind of concepts and philosophies he would employ on the court.
Me against the world is a mismatch in my favor.
He'd be an NBA basketball coach
So he’d tell people to shoot and pass properly. Oh, and make sure you grab some boards
NBA coach is the most overrated tactician coach there is.
www.TheDreamShake.com Co-Founder and Writer
I have to disagree heartily
There’s a reason Chicago jumped from the 10th best defense last year to the best defense in the league this year. That reason isn’t named Boozer. I would attribute that most of that jump to improved defensive schemes implemented by Tom Thibodeau.
Now obviously there’s a lot that goes into being a good NBA coach, and you’re probably right in that most NBA coaches are probably pretty much interchangeable as far as how much their schemes actually improve the team (It may even be that the Bull’s improvement is due as much to how terrible Vinny Del Negro is as a coach as to how good Thibodeau is).
I don’t want an interchangeable coach, though. I want the best coach available. I’d probably be a little disappointed is Elie is the best coach Morey can find.
That's all taught in practice though
So yes, I get that for sure. But Thibodeau is the exception to me, and not the rule
www.TheDreamShake.com Co-Founder and Writer
Let me go further
Pretty much everyone agrees that Phil Jackson is inarguably one of the greatest coaches of all time. Now, granted, he has Kobe and Pau and Shaq before that. That said. The guy rarely calls timeouts, is consistently leaving players in for a longer time than any of us wanted.
But a coach in the NBA simply needs to be good at managing players and using them to their strengths. When I say tactician I mean that calling plays in a game is even more overrated in the NBA than it is in baseball choosing when to hit and run. The actual behind the scenes stuff is where it matters, and 85% of that is the players simply trusting the coach and taking on his philosophy.
With Elie your going to get a guy that wants to play hard nosed D and find the open guy in the offense.
www.TheDreamShake.com Co-Founder and Writer
With Elie your going to get a guy that wants to play hard nosed D and find the open guy in the offense.
Do most coaches prefer soft D and contested jumpers?
I don’t really disagree with anything you say, but offensive and defensive schemes are installed behind the scenes and those make moderate differences in the way a team plays. I’m sure talented assistant coaches could go a long way in that regard, but would Elie be able to lure any Thibodeaus to coach under him?
I don’t really have a problem with having Elie as a coach, I just suspect that his support is more because of his history with the Rockets than because he’d actually be the best man for the job.
NBA coach is the most overrated tactician coach there is.
Absolutely agree. Morey has said a coach is worth 5 games at most and some statistical data I was looking at showed Thibodeau was only worth 3 wins this year. Furthermore, all coaches have a small impact on offense, but really make their presence felt on D (which is basically just getting players to buy in and work).
I'm going to have to strongly disagree with this....
“NBA coach is the most overrated tactician coach there is.”
It takes a guy with serious knowledge, experience, and balls to draw up that clipboard in the fourth quarter. The coach has to instill confidence into every single one of his players, and manage every ego and there has to be a trust amongst everyone to be on the same page. This is just a small sample size of what an NBA coach must be able to do, and compare this to an American League manager for example. I mean besides making up a line up, making a call to the bull pen and a pitching change, there’s not much to it. WIth the exception of hockey, I would say that team continuity is most prevelant with basketball. There are coaches on all levels who has drawn up a last second play before, and that one play has been the difference between another profession or making it bigtime.
Funny how Memphis' ****-up has become Houston's obsession
agreed. well stated
"it just goes to show ya: People look like famous people sometimes! "
- chuckhayesALLSTAR2010
by ClutchFanSince94 on May 7, 2011 1:19 PM CDT up reply actions
I think I see where the tactician thing comes in though. This is a general reply by the way, just got back online recently.
When it comes to the tactical side, calling plays, etc…, that’s what he’s referring to. NBA coaches draw up out of bounds plays but for the most part if you trust your point guard, you let them run it. If a play goes tits up, the players sort it out. Managing egos and what not isn’t tactical, it’s not making decisive calls of action on the court, most of what is cited isn’t tactical aspects of coaching.
I agree with everything you said about the resume a coach has to deal with a juggle, but I entirely see where UofT was going with his tactical statement.
TDS's resident dickhead.
Way more to it than that
How does the coach treat his players? Do they respect him? Can he attract free agents? The right people are needed to run the right scheme. Rudy T’s Rockets could not play D like JVG’s Rockets and that is one reason they blew that team up. So the question remains to be answered. How much change in players will take place under the new coach?
also agreed. well stated
"it just goes to show ya: People look like famous people sometimes! "
- chuckhayesALLSTAR2010
by ClutchFanSince94 on May 7, 2011 1:19 PM CDT up reply actions
Not at all
Just comparing them to the JVG and how he felt he needed a different set of players and his attitude towards defense first. I think the Rudy T team was more balanced. Right now we have a team of good players who play well together and work hard. Will we get a superstar or two that can take us to the next level?
Heart of the champion coach?
Brilliance of Rudy T wasnt scheme, was getting his team to play like a tough team, look damn happy doing it
Ooooo me me me!!!
Hitch my trailer to Elie/Cassell
B^2
Organic Chemist PhD Student by day...Houston sports fan by night!
I'm in
my favorite image from those years was Mario wearing a t-shirt that had both rings on it and the caption “Two, the hard way”! To answer your question Batman, I would think “defend & run” would be the major focus. I doubt the offence would change much. When we had Mario and Maxwell they would get all up in folks faces. Having Dream waiting at the rim was helpful, but defense is about attitude, I think Mario would bring that.
I wouldn't mind Elie,
but right now, Dwane Casey is my guy.
When he was coaching the T-Wolves, post KG, they were a .500 team under him, or close to it. That’s very impressive.
He also fits a rebuilding team, so he works.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
There are lots of coaches with experience coaching sub 500 teams. I remember those T-Wolves sucked hard, big time and is still pretty much sucking.
"it just goes to show ya: People look like famous people sometimes! "
- chuckhayesALLSTAR2010
by ClutchFanSince94 on May 7, 2011 12:01 PM CDT up reply actions
.500 ball is easy
We want a 60 win team. We want a championship. Maybe someone with 2 the hard way can push this team to that level. We will still need a big man under the basket. The only question then is who?
.500 ball with the T-Wolves is the equivalent of a 60 win season with the Rockets, or any other talented team.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on May 7, 2011 6:03 PM CDT up reply actions
ok fellas....
Dwane Casey’s record with Minnesota as a head coach was 53-69. He was fired in January of 2007, and Randy Wittman took his job. Wasn’t post KG, he didn’t get traded to Boston until the summer of 2007. So technically, after Flip Saunders left, that franchise went to shit under Casey. KG wasn’t hurt or anything, he played in 76 games that season.
Funny how Memphis' ****-up has become Houston's obsession
Hmmm
Thought it was post-KG.
I still like Casey though.
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on May 7, 2011 11:57 PM CDT up reply actions
I really believe that Elie would already be head coach of the Kings
had he not gotten tagged with the DUI last December. Westphal was on the hottest of hot seats at the time, and the organization appeared ready to make a change.
I think that Elie would be a great head coach, and Houston would be a great fit for him. Selfishly, I’d like to keep him around in Sacramento for awhile longer.
SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!
awww, come on section214
Sacramento already gave us Kevin Martin… and before that Ron Artest… and before that Rick Adelman… and before that Otis Thorpe. Plus you were kind enough to take Luther Head off our hands. It just seems to be the regular course of dealing that you would also be inclined to let us take Mario Elie, too!
I'm not sure that I want to part with Elie,
but I have a Gavin and Joe Maloof that might interest you. Their brains are like new…hardly ever used…and they own a casino (kind of, if you ignore the massive debt load).
Whaddya say? What do I have to do to put you behind the wheel of these guys today?
SACTOWN ROYALTY - Try our thick creamy shakes!
They were technically ours first too
We only win trades with you guys.
Remember, their dad, and them by proxy owned the Rockets early on in our history
www.TheDreamShake.com Co-Founder and Writer
No, please don't take our Elie from us.
We love this guy, I know you will love him, too. I have no doubt Elie would be a great coach. If you get him, I will be happy for you, but sad for us.
The key to any game is to use your strengths and hide your weaknesses.
-Paul Westphal
Wow, Kings invasion!
Good feelings about Elie already.
WE LOVED HIM FIRST!
www.TheDreamShake.com Co-Founder and Writer
by UofTOrange on May 6, 2011 12:32 PM CDT up reply actions 3 recs
This is the very obvious response.
EvilCowtownInc: Screwin Suckaz over since 1985...... On Twitter
No mistakes in the tango, Donna. Not like life. Simple. That's what makes the tango so great. If you make a mistake, and get all tangled up, you just tango on.....
No former ballboys or equipment managers or video guys. Yes, I know Erik Spoelstra is a fine coach and he’s managed to not slap LeBron across the face for being the bitch he is, but… those kinds of coaches tend to get no respect from NBA professionals. It will catch up to Mr. Spoelstra soon enough.
Completely agree.
But why Elie over Cassel? Experience? I think Cassel has more of the natural leader aspect than Elie.
Sam's new
Elis has put in his dues, while Same is only in his 2nd year coaching. Same would be better in one-on-one teaching drills, too – something a head coach doesn’t have time for.
Check out Mario on WIki
look at the timeline of how he got to the NBA. You travel that path and end up with three rings, you will get respect. This guy started out as a NYC blacktop legend, (The Jedi), in Central Park. From there he played in leagues I have never heard of for 5 years before getting to the show. That kind of determination gets my vote.
I'd much rather hire Casey and place Elie on the bench as an assistant.
The more I hear about Casey, the clearer it becomes to me that he’s the right guy. I can’t place any credibility in his stint in Minnesota. The team was terrible and he was yanked after only a season and a half.
The Dream Shake ...on Twitter.
"I think girls are probably just better shooters." - Steve Novak
+1
"Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cuz you were too
close kissin his!"- Sir Charles to Kenny Smith.
by bone31crusher on May 6, 2011 8:58 PM CDT up reply actions
What kind of staff would Elie put together?
Cassell, maybe?
Would Carril come with him? He knows our offense.
Brown was my first choice, but now I prefer Frank and then Cassell in that order.
Fire Johnson and hire Brown - I'm telling you Thorn was smoking somethin' when he let Brown slip away in the night.
by diehardNFFLbarnone on May 6, 2011 3:12 PM CDT reply actions
I wish I could contribute something intellegent to this comments list
For some reason I haven’t been able to concentrate the last couple of weeks. All I know is I’d like Stan Van Gundy. I don’t even have a good argument for him.
If you're a fan of basketball, watch a movie called Sonicsgate. It's free, just google it.
if no one else is a given lets keep the job in the family
and HIRE Elie for three
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Monta's not very good right now.
I would have thought the Morey people would know that!?
As a Warrior fan i do remember Elie. I liked him a lot more than Keith Smart that’s forsure. I think you are all missing Morey’s dream candidate: Dave Joerger of Memphis. He’s an analytic dude, and is the defensive guy in Memphis. I think he might get it.
"Of course, these people couldn’t really have predicted...the joke of a mockery of a sham of a circus of Keith Smart’s nightly rotations. " - Sleepy Freud
Steph Curry and Reggie Williams all day baby!
by GovernorStephCurry on May 6, 2011 8:59 PM CDT reply actions
Rich man's Steve Francis
Ellis is way more effective than Francis was. Francis was supposed to be more than what he was. That said, I feel like he entered the league already in his prime though.
Me against the world is a mismatch in my favor.
Looks like Mike Brown has taken himself out of the running to be a Rockets coach
This is according to Ric Bucher on an espn chat: (Look at 12th question by Jackson from NYC)
http://espn.go.com/sportsnation/chat/_/id/38292/nba-with-ric-bucher
Ric says that Casey from the Mavericks so far is in the lead.
An ESPN chat is not proof of anything.
Fire Johnson and hire Brown - I'm telling you Thorn was smoking somethin' when he let Brown slip away in the night.
by diehardNFFLbarnone on May 7, 2011 10:22 AM CDT up reply actions
Also if the Rockets respect Carlisle and Brown has taken his name OUT of consideration, then Lawrence Frank would be the overwhelming frontrunner.
Fire Johnson and hire Brown - I'm telling you Thorn was smoking somethin' when he let Brown slip away in the night.
by diehardNFFLbarnone on May 7, 2011 10:26 AM CDT up reply actions
Although it is info from a chat I don't think Bucher would say something completely false
he didn’t give his opinion, he stated it as a fact so he must have got some sort of indication from someone that Brown pulled him self out. I think Frank would be great but I also wouldn’t mind Casey.
by Rockets4LIFE on May 7, 2011 10:36 AM CDT up reply actions
I enjoyed reading this write-up
and I do agree with Elie, I mean it seems like everything has come together for him to have this opportunity. And Sam Cassell, get the hell out of Washington and be part of his staff. I definitely think some coaches have an in with Morey if they have a backgound in putting together statistcial and scouting reports…. Also think some coaches have an in with Les, and the city would respond very well with the former Clutch City champ. While I don’t think a big name coach is answer, one like Elie who’s relative to the city could be a win win.
Funny how Memphis' ****-up has become Houston's obsession
How Elie would fit in
Elie could fill some gaps in the organization. They currently have an analytic GM and perhaps need someone with playing credentials. Adelman is a great coach, but he is far removed from his playing days and with DM who has zero playing experience, perhaps the Rockets had too much analytics and not enough grit. No one played tougher than Elie and he could bring mental toughness to the team.
However, we don’t know anything about Elie’s coaching ability of philosophy. We know he was hired by Paul Westphal (who Elie buried in 95 with the kiss of death, ironic), so he has probably learned a lot about the fast paced game that Westphal coached. That would be a big plus.
Also, Rudy T was a former player from the same mold as Elie. To have Elie come back as the coach would be a great homecoming story and if he doesn’t get it, I will be a little dissapointed. The down side is it would be terrible if he didn’t do well and the Rockets had to part ways with him because this is a guy who has figured prominently in Rockets lore and history. Although, former-player coaches have made the transition to head coach before and haven’t always worked out and it wasn’t the end of the world.
In conclusion, I would say that we should hire Elie. He can probably do the x’s and o’s and the Rockets could really use someone with his credibility and leadership in getting guys to play together and play hard D.
"it just goes to show ya: People look like famous people sometimes! "
- chuckhayesALLSTAR2010
by ClutchFanSince94 on May 7, 2011 12:11 PM CDT reply actions
*ability or philosophy
"it just goes to show ya: People look like famous people sometimes! "
- chuckhayesALLSTAR2010
by ClutchFanSince94 on May 7, 2011 12:13 PM CDT up reply actions
Lakers are going to implode the next 2 seasons,
Dwight will be a Laker if he’s not on the Magic. For superstar players, it’s not just who has a good team and a lot of money, it’s also, which city can I market my brand or image. The best bet for smaller market teams is to acquire potential, then try and keep them around and obviously that’s not always sucessful. One thing cities like Houston and Atlanta have are strong backgrounds in rap and pop culture that’s popular amongst NBA players. NBA players can relate to “dirty south” or “UGK” references, so that gives some cities a leg up. I mean if you’re a veteran superstar, your city better have beaches(not called Galveston) or a huge populated media market where you can be more sucessful. Fair? not really, but it’s the way it is.
Funny how Memphis' ****-up has become Houston's obsession
Someone is going to someday explain this Dwight to the Lakers thing to me in a way that makes sense.
Minnesotan Rockets fan
Carmello Anthony makes that possible until the new CBA most likely clamps down on that bullshit.
I disagree with the idea of the Lakers imploding. They’re losing to a very good Mavericks team that matches up well with them. It’s like the Grizz/Spurs series, if a match up favors one team, don’t be shocked when the team with the advantage wins.
TDS's resident dickhead.
We should start inquiring about the Gasols right away
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Really? You're citing rap and hip hop for a draw to younger players?
Stopped taking you seriously forever, right there.
TDS's resident dickhead.
yes, cities like Houston and Atlanta have a leg up on
Indiana and Utah when it comes to acquiring free agents. Whether you want to believe or not, a city’s demographics play a huge role in their decision as to where to play. Have you been like living under a rock recently? Believe it or not, these players have lives outside of basketball. And a lot of them have vested interest into the rap and hip hop culture, and Houston is a popular city. Players get paid a ton of money to make appearances to clubs and venues. I’m not saying that every NBA players is into that culture, but it’s prevelant. So next time try and have a clue about what the hell you’re talking about before making a dumbass implication and trying to be a smart ass, because you’re the one who looks like an idiot in the end.
Funny how Memphis' ****-up has become Houston's obsession
I love your diatribe about something unrelated. At the end of the day you're still dumb as a post.
You leaned on rap and hip hop as an attractive feature to a city. No shit players are attracted to certain cities. I’m well spoken on that issue.
A rap and hip hop scene doesn’t mean much to a basketball player for the simple fact that they make enough money to travel, electronics, studios, and the internet exist, and players can afford to produce their own label if they damn well please. Let alone a studio in their home.
As far as nightlife venues if your arguing that Houston’s nightlife is comparable to that of LA or New York’s you need to hop off the glue. Toronto is a world class city and doesn’t have a huge draw for American players, for international players they tend to enjoy the city as a very international city.
So, I love to disappoint you, but you may want to take your butthurt elsewhere before you keep trying to take verbal swings at me. You framed your entire argument around rap and hip hop scenes.
TDS's resident dickhead.
ok genius... when you're wrong you try and go back and put in words that are missing.
So let’s recap.. Someone mentioned Dwight Howard and the Rockets. I said if he goes anywhere, it would be LA. Superstars with choices will go to where they can win and make the most money. While Houston is not LA or New York or even Miami….. they do have a leg up on other cities because of the demographics. Steve Francis can make an appearance at Hush nightclub and make a **** pile of money, it’s just the way it is and it happens often. That’s not the case for every city. You misconstrued a simple point I was making for the sake of argument. And once again, I’m right and you’re wrong. You know just because you think up something or believe something doesn’t mean it’s true. T I in Atl, 3-6 in Memphis.. UGK in Houston… Player vest interest into rap and hip hop ok… Get that through your head… A free agent player may see the scene in Houston more attractive because of the demographics more so than the midwest. Also, please let me know where I said Houston has the same night life as NY, LA, Miami. I will save your time, I didn’t. It’s not comparable. But Houston does have something going for them that most other smaller market teams do not. Perhaps while you’re in law school, you should learn to fucking read and comprehend. Calling you out on all your shit is getting old.
Funny how Memphis' ****-up has become Houston's obsession
and just be straight....
Atlanta with Luda, TI, Gucci Mayne, Young Jeezy, Ying Yang Twins and whoever have little to no effect on luring NBA players to Atlanta. And 3-6 Mafia has little to no effect to luring players to Memphis? Because this is what you’re saying… And there are several publications that would prove otherwise. And I’m not even using the Jay Z effect because he has interest in the team… So once again, despite actual truths, you’re right. Get a fucking grip dude…
Funny how Memphis' ****-up has become Houston's obsession
I think he sounds like a good candidate.
I’ll set one foot on your bandwagon.
"You know how Einstein got bad grades as a kid? Well, mine are
even worse! " ~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes
by TheChuckwagonisrolling on May 8, 2011 12:59 PM CDT reply actions
What about Darrell Armstrong as head coach?
Fire Johnson and hire Brown - I'm telling you Thorn was smoking somethin' when he let Brown slip away in the night.
by diehardNFFLbarnone on May 8, 2011 4:21 PM CDT reply actions
I AGREE!!!! I am on the Elie bandwagon
Just want a coach to take us to that next level, not just rebuild and improve the .500 team, want to push the envelope and push the players to want to be better as players and want to be WINNERS!!! I think Elie can bring that!
If you think a different coach will be a difference maker your problems are too great for us to solve.
This roster isn’t built to get the job done, even with a center upgrade.
TDS's resident dickhead.


























