the fat ass Stories - The Dream Shake
We won't have Shaq's fat @$$ to kick around anymore
Oh, Happy Day! Shaquille O'Neal has announced his retirement. Alas, I'm sure there will be another lazy, oversized 30 year old going on 13 to take his place... /Team Kobe All joking aside, Shaq was the last active member of the 1992 draft class. The same group that brought us Alonzo...
Deal with it... Kobe Bryant is a top 10 player of all time
The storyline that began about 5 milliseconds after the Lakers/Magic series concluded in five games was Kobe's place in history. Kobe Bryant now has a championship sans Shaquille O'Neal. He's now a 4-time NBA champion (something even Larry Bird cannot claim). In the last 2 years, Kobe has been...
How the 2009 Orlando Magic are eerily similar to the 1995 Houston Rockets
I've finally come out of my "Houston Rockets eliminated from the playoffs" coma. It allowed me to closely watch most of the Conference Finals games. In particular, I got to watch a lot of the Orlando Magic (because their games with Cleveland started at reasonable times). By watching these...
David Stern's dreams are crushed. No LeBron v. Kobe this year.
Rafer Alston, Rashard Lewis and the Orlando Magic have dispatched with the LeBrons in six games. Maybe this offseason LeBron will learn to stop shooting off-balance threes and bailing out the defense in crucial moments. He's quickly becoming the most frustrating player for me to watch. LeBron...
6 in a row? Ugh
I am far, far away from civilization or a working computer with a good database of images. I barely have access to ESPN until tomorrow...how the (@&(#*& did the Rockets lose to the Heat? The f--king Miami Heat? Let me guess - Rafer is back to sucking?I knew it - the bastard finally shoots...
He's a threat to Western Civilization!
Hey, Fat Ass, I'm getting sick of your act. I mean, in 1992 when you and Horry were rookies, you were great - a breath of fresh air to the league. An oversized kid. The problem is, it is 16 years later - and you still have not grown up. You are 35 years old, and act like you are 15. It is no longer...
I'm back and... we lost to the Fat Ass?!?!?
I'm running on fumes and what is left of my adrenaline from Las Vegas.I'd like to thank Villanova, San Diego and UNLV for being awesome and making me money.I'd like to give a double-fisted middle finger to Indiana, Oregon and especially St. Joseph's. Oh, and Kansas, too. Kansas couldn't hit the...
During tonight's game...
Lee and I will both be unable to partake in the festivity tonight that is "making fun of that Fat Ass." Neither of us will be able to watch the game... which is a shame.Our friends over at Bright Side of the Sun suggested doing a live-blog of tonight's game. But since we can't be there... why not...
No Shane, No Problem!
The Defensive Player of the Year unfortunately had to miss last night's game against the Phoenix Suns...no problem. Rockets win anyway. As usual.Suck it, Fat Ass!!Deke wags his finger at your pathetic efforts to win...
The best thing you will read all day. I promise.
Suck it, Fat Ass.
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