Ethan Rothstein, our editor in chief and chief who is also an editor, asked me to start a weekly column, in which I bring you the Weird Rockets Video of the Week. At first I was like, "Are there really that many videos that I could use," and the answer to that question was yes, yes, an overwhelmingly intense and absolute yes. I don't think we knew what we were getting ourselves into.
Steve Francis MTV Cribs
"Steve Francis at MTV Crivbs."
Damn. Do you remember Steve Francis? Stevie Franchise? Man. He was the man. He was also, y'know, very not the man. He did a lot of cool stuff, but he also did a lot of not cool stuff like be bad at playing with Yao Ming, which seems like it would be super hard to do.
For some context, Steve Francis was a point guard for the Houston Rockets for a long time before he got traded to Orlando for Tracy McGrady. He wasn't happy about that, really. For more context, Cribs was a show on MTV where famous people showed a camera their insane houses. This was filmed just after he was traded to Orlando, so his whole house is still basically Rockets themed. I'm counting it as a Rockets video I don't know if Orlando Pinstriped Post has this column.
Often, athletes had some of the most extravagant stuff. I'm not sure the Franchise made that cut, but there are some pretty absurd moments that I wanna talk about.
I think Steve Francis just became the greatest player in NBA history. Dude says "it tends to rain in Houston," so he keeps an umbrella in the door of his car. Yeah, Steve? You really use that? Sure you do, Steve. Whatever you say, Steve.
One of the best parts of the show Cribs was that every celebrity felt inclined to show you what was in their fridge. Like, it's usually just normal stuff, but their still like, "Alright, time to show y'all my fridge. As you can see, we got some milk. Some eggs, you know how we do." Stuff like that. But then, true to form, Stevie Franchise was like, "Look. I own bottles of champagne." Man. How did we ever trade you, Steve?
"Personalized tub. I think you can fit about... 3 people in here..."
Yeah, Steve? You think? Yeah?
Man. What a video. What a show. What a guy.
Here is the best comment from this video. I had 105 to choose from.
Bmatikbeatz, if that is your real name, I don't think I've ever trusted anymore more on what is and isn't "genious" than you. I mean, let's recap this whole comment, my dude.
First off, Bmatikbeatz, you used a question mark and exclamation in one sentence, which is grammatically fine. I have no problem with the grammar of that. But Bmatikbeats, you used the separated interrobang to talk about a place where some random guy can cut his hair. Not only does he have to pay that person, but he had to pay to have that room made. You know what room that can be done in? Literally any room in the house, Bmatikbeatz. Think with your head, Bmatikbeatz.
That was your Weird Rockets Video of the Week. Come back next Wednesday when I'll show you some other ridiculous thing because this is who I am now.