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Ty Lawson and the Rockets' worst case scenario

In an attempt to temper some expectations, Colin shares an email from someone you will hopefully love to hate...

Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports

I texted Ethan a couple days ago and asked him if there needed to be some presentation on the site of the possible worst-case scenario, post-Ty Lawson trade. He responded and said, "Our coverage hasn't exactly been measured." It hasn't, but neither has any of my excitement towards Ty Lawson.

I could give you the same stats you've been reading all week, or I could link you to all the highlights that could get you even more excited, but I do think that it would valuable to measure ourselves and our excitement, if only for a moment.

Luckily, there's someone who can do that for me who I haven't told you guys about. It's a guy that I've had to deal with the entire time I've been a Rockets fan. When Steve Francis was traded for Tracy McGrady, he said, "Watch him be injured all the time..." When the Rockets drew Portland in the first round two years ago, he said, "I don't know... That Damian Lillard guy is pretty good." When Scottie Pippen went to Houston, he said, "Oh sure, let's see how good he is without Michael."

Then, within this last week, while I've been excited about this trade, he's said, "Ty Lawson is a problem, not a solution." He's like a mix of Saturday Night Live's Debby Downer and Terrible Sports Radio's Colin Cowherd. His name is Charles Drains, and he raises some decent points.

But first, just so you have a better idea about Charles Drains, he's the kind of guy who would say, "Eh, it wasn't that good anyway," when Blue Bell stopped making ice cream. He's the kind of guy who likes Los Angeles "just for the people." He's the guy who would insist his mom buy Kix Cereal as a kid when she would try to buy Frosted Flakes. He wrote me an email the day after the Lawson trade. Here is that email:

Dear Colin,

How are you? Good? Excited about the Clutch City Jerseys? Too bad they have sleeves... Oh well.

It seems like you and the guys at the website are pretty excited about Ty Lawson. It would be a shame if I had to ruin it for you, but here it goes...

Ty Lawson has an issue, and Houston is not adequate city to fix such an issue. In the wake of the trade, there have been reports after reports about Lawson's drinking issue. Houston, at least according to rap songs (and a decent amount of fact), is pretty fond of alcohol (and other illegal dranks). It's not exactly inspiring that your supposed "answer" at the point guard position is legally required to spend time in rehab. James Harden isn't exactly about to be the best influence in the wake of that. And what are they gonna do if it does work out, pop sparkling cider with the Larry O'Brien Trophy?

And how's this gonna work with Patrick Beverley? I know Pat seems to think it'll go just fine, but are you really going to trust a guy who's supposed to be a Top 10 point guard to come off the bench? Are you ready for Vernon Maxwell, Part 2? Is the team ready for that? Is the city of Houston ready for that?

Also, what if he just straight up doesn't fit in with the team? Harden seems to be into spreading the love off in the offseason, but can he do it with the ball-handling on a consistent basis? I hear that he wants help handling the ball, but what's the saying about "the most dangerous thing is getting exactly what you want?" Oh, it's that exactly? I thought so...

Look, he's a good player who did a lot with the little help he had in Denver last season. And you know what they did in response? They drafted a point guard and traded him away. I guess it's lucky Morey didn't give up that much for him, and hopefully you guys re-sign Jason Terry just in case. You know how I love the JET and all his wristbands ever since he was in Dallas. You ever think about liking the Mavericks?


Charles Drains


What do you think about "Chuck Drains" or "Chazz Drains?" I don't know, just spitballing...

I still like Ty Lawson, but I hate Charles "I Prefer Mr. Pibb" Drains. Even if he does have some decent points.