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TDS Reacts: The New Rockets Jerseys

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Join The Dream Shake staff by giving the new Houston Rockets your own grade.

The Houston Rockets debuted new alternate jerseys to mixed reviews.

There was some love. There was some hate. There was some, OMG stop trying to make sleeves happen. It's not going to happen.

To make the general opinion of the three new Rockets jerseys even more ambiguous we asked The Dream Shake staff to weigh in with their rankings and thoughts.

Each writer assigned a 0 - 5 ranking for each jersey and gave us a line about it.

3 new unis HRtwitter


Grey Jersey -- Dwight Howard

Xiane - 2 - Nod to the space program is cool, but should be more apparent, there aren't enough cues that suggest Nasa.
Ian - 3 - This are an obvious ode to the early space program's gemini rockets- which is cool idea- but the execution lacks flair. Also, Sleeves.
Ethan - 1 - This reminds me of a somehow worse version of the grey jerseys trotted out in recent years by the Suns, Spurs and Celtics. I don't know how they made this one worse than those, but it is.
Ryan - 1 - Sleeves. Death to sleeves. I appreciate the node to the space program and the gumine rocket. But those details get lost on the sides and require explanation to make sense.
Colin - 1- I almost hope we lose the first three times we wear it so we retire it as bad luck.
Danny - 1 - Business in the front, name on the back, checkers on the side. Get rid of the sleeves, please.
Brandon - 1 - I've pissed better color patterns in the snow... while drunk... and doing a handstand.
Max - 1 - Dwight Howard wearing a checkered flag should be reserved for the cover NASCAR Illustrated.

The Dream Shake Staff Average: 1.375

3 new unis

Red Jersey -- Donatas Motiejunas

Xiane - 3 - *sigh* But I'd rather see a straight up 94-95 jersey worn in all its glory. That would recall Clutch City better than saying it.
Ian - 4 - Again, sleeves, but the Red and Yellow will always be ketchup and mustard and 90's and fucking cool.
Ethan - 4 - This is the only one with "Clutch City" on the front, though, so it's awesome automatically
Ryan - 0 - The lettering is all over the place, uppercase and lowercase all over the place. These jersey are reported to be replacing the ketchup and mustard alternates, which is a crime.
Colin - 4 - I am 100% sure that I look better in a sleeved jersey as opposed to a sleeveless one, but that's no reason to make james harden wear sleeves.
Danny - 5 - What it reminds you of or why (sentence or less): Induct this jersey into the University of Nastiness ASAP. Fire emojis.
Brandon - 4 - Perfect but for "Clutch City" occupying 100% more space than the number.
Max - 4 - Fire emojis. "Clutch City" placement keeps this from being a five.

The Dream Shake Staff Average: 3.5

3 new unis

Black Jersey -- Sam Dekker

Xiane - 3 - Can't tell what team it is for. Surely it can't be the Rockets, as these colors are only vaguely related to any Rockets scheme. Honestly, of all the gimmick uniforms of recent times my favorite is the LNY/CNY one.
Ian - 4 - These would be a 5 if they accenting was yellow around the collar and the "R" but the black sports car thing they have going is unquestionably dope.
Ethan - 3 - I tend to like black jerseys, but this one just doesn't grab me the way the Timberwolves' one did last year or the Nets' road unis do. Maybe it's because Dekker has pencils for arms.
Ryan - 2 - A black jersey doesn't seem to fit with the most recent Rockets look. The red detail on the jersey is nice, it plays well off the black.
Colin - 3 - I like where this is going
Danny - 3 - Sleek, jet black on the front is nice, font is uninviting.
Brandon - 5 - The bastard child of the Raptors branding and the Nets branding. I own a black James Harden jersey...
Max - 2 - Please hum Seven Nation Army while looking at this jersey.

The Dream Shake Staff Average: 3.125

The red jersey was the big winner. An outlying rating of zero brought the average of the jersey down, but it was the easy winner.

Have thoughts on the new jersey? Fill out the same form The Dream Shake staff did. Copy and paste it in the comments with your own ratings.

Rate the new jerseys

Grey Jersey (Dwight Howard) --
Rating 1 - 5:
What it reminds you of (sentence or less):

Red Jersey (Donatas Motiejunas) --
Rating 1 - 5:
What it reminds you of (sentence or less):

Black Jersey (Sam Dekker) --
Rating 1 - 5:
What it reminds you of (sentence or less):