Eric Gordon was the highlight of All-Star Saturday night if you were a Rockets fan, knocking down more than 60 three-pointers in three minutes to win the three-point shootout.
Gordon is the first Rocket to ever win the event, coming through for James Harden and all the Rockets before him who came up short.
Gordon had the best round of the whole exhibition to start off his night, with 25 points. He made it to the finals against Kyrie Irving and Kemba Walker and kinda sorta choked on his final rack. Kyrie had set the pace at 20, and Gordon had 19 before getting to the far corner. He hit just one of the five shots there, and a tiebreaker was required.
Irving had to go first, and his legs were clearly not the same. He missed several of his shots badly, and didnt even crack 20 points. The man formerly known as E.J. cruised to a score of 21, and took the trophy. Harden was cheering for him courtside the whole time, dressed in something like a mithril shirt and jacket.
After that moment, the night unraveled. In an effort for charity, loads of people including Harden, Gordon, Irving, DJ Khaled and Anthony Anderson shot threes from the top of the key for cancer research in honor of the late Craig Sager.
To top it all off, they trotted out Golden Boy Stephen Curry, shooting three half court shots, to give $500,000 to charity. Would that it ‘twere so simple.
Curry missed on all three shots. Then he missed again. Again and again. The greatest shooter ever could not find the basket. It was painful yet amusing to watch, like an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Eventually, despite Ernie Johnson’s steadfastly hopeful pleas for “just one more,” Curry had nothing left. The shots were farther from their target than ever.
With one final airball, it was over. The dunk contest that followed was just as bad. DeAndre Jordan was mediocre, Aaron Gordon started in the worst drone commercial ever — hope it was worth the money, Intel! — and Glenn Robinson III won just by being good at jumping over people.
If you have this DVR-ed, turn it off after Gordon wins. You'll be glad you did.