It’s amazing that on the day of the Copa America Final these rumors have come to light! Simply incredible, and you read it here first.
Some sources (a coffee mug, a sprouting potato) suggest the Houston Rockets want to accelerate their rebuild by adding instant star power. This could be available in the form of Lionel Messi, and Neymar da Silva Santos Junior. While these reports are unconfirmed, and unreal, they might distract you from the endless Cade, Green, Mobley merry-go-round.
Neither player is known for playing basketball, but the Houston Rockets front office is known for “thinking outside the box”, “leaving no stone unturned”, “focusing on analytics”. Perhaps they want a reputation for “Doing Something Insane” as well?
It’s clear that the analytics, and pure statistical data, suggest that both are excellent players, true superstars. It’s also worth noting that none of those statistics pertain to basketball, and neither player is currently NBA draft eligible. But the Rockets might be masters of proprietary cross-sport analytics. We honestly don’t know.
Let’s have a look, in case the Houston Rockets surprise everyone and draft two South American soccer playing mega-stars, rather than the expected, run-of-the-mill, young basketball prospects with the 23rd, and 24th pick of the upcoming draft. No one is suggesting taking one of these players with the 2nd pick. That would be crazy.
Strengths - Offense, Shooting, Passing, Attacking The Goal, Ball Control, Free Agent
Weaknesses - 5’7” (in the same way Chris Paul is 6’), Age (34), Tax Fraud Issues, No Known Basketball Ability, High Salary Demands, Doesn’t Get Back on Defense, Mopey, Dour
Must Improve - Height, Age, Basketball Ability
Analysis - No one can deny that Lionel Messi would bring instant star power, and media attention to the Houston Rockets, and give them a decided edge in any soccer games that might break out. The question, really, for Messi, is why would he want to muddy his legacy at this point? But he’s a driven player, and he may have achieved all the world’s most popular sport can offer him at this point, aside from national team success. Could it be there is one more hill to climb? One more way to prove the doubters wrong? One jab at Barcelona that no one will see coming?
Strenghts - Speed, Ball Control, Shooting, Foul Drawing, Natural Scorer, One Name, Elaborate Hair, Draws Contact, Draws A Lot of Contact For Some Reason
Weaknesses - 5’9”, 90lbs, Injury Prone, Criminal Allegations in the USA, Falls Over Frequently, Commitment to Basketball, Defense, Pouts, Party Lifestyle
Must Improve - Health, Basketball Ability, Alleged Criminal Activity, Proactive Dad/Agent
Analysis - An electric player from an early age, Neymar has never quite lived up to expectations. Could a change of sport help? Would leaving PSG allow for more self-expression? Would he show up for 82 games, and then playoffs. The Rockets won’t known unless they give it a chance.
Some might think that the Rockets would do better to draft, say, Erling Haaland, who is 6’4”, 200lbs, only 20 and quite fast and strong, irrespective of basketball ability. Unlike Messi or Neymar, it seems likely Haaland can dunk. But is Norway playing in Copa America, OR the Euros? I think not.
But what do you think? This is, no doubt, a quick way for the Rockets to add guaranteed star power in the upcoming draft.
Which Star to Draft?
This poll is closed